Let’s be clear: psychological safety isn’t about coddling.
It’s not toxic positivity.
And it’s definitely not everyone singing kumbaya around a whiteboard.
It’s about creating the kind of environment where people speak up, challenge ideas, admit mistakes—and still feel like they belong.
And as a leader, if you’re not building that kind of space?
You’re not just losing trust.
You’re losing ideas, energy, innovation, and influence.
What Psychological Safety Is (And What It’s Not)
Psychological safety means people feel safe to:
- Speak up without fear of embarrassment or retaliation
- Admit mistakes or ask for help
- Offer dissenting views without being shut down
- Take risks without being punished for failing
It’s not about being soft.
It’s about being strong enough to create space for the hard stuff—disagreement, debate, vulnerability, and growth.
What Happens When You Don’t Have It
When psychological safety is missing, here’s what shows up instead:
- Silence in meetings
- Passive-aggressive communication
- Withholding of ideas and feedback
- Fear of failure
- Leaders who unintentionally shut people down
According to PsychSafety.com, the “Seven Deadly Sins” of psychological safety include:
- Interrupting
- Dismissing contributions
- Blaming
- Micromanaging
- Ignoring feedback
These slowly erode trust until silence becomes the culture.
💬 My Wake-Up Call: What Shut Me Down—and What That Taught Me About Leading Others
I didn’t always have the language for psychological safety.
I just knew what it felt like to be dismissed.
When I was growing up, I tried to voice a concern.
A family member looked at me and said:
“That’s because I know whatever you’re about to say is going to be dumb.”
That shut me down—not just in that moment, but for years.
I stopped speaking up. I stopped trusting my voice.
And I carried that into adulthood… until I became a leader.
I found myself frustrated when people wouldn’t speak up in meetings.
And then it hit me: they were feeling what I once felt.
That experience taught me: psychological safety isn’t just a work culture issue—it’s a healing issue.
Start With the Mirror
Ask yourself:
- How did your upbringing shape your view on conflict?
- Do you welcome pushback—or shut it down quickly?
- Do your people speak up around you—or retreat?
Even the look on your face in a meeting can shut someone down.
What It Sounds Like
- “That’s an interesting idea. Tell me more.”
- “Let’s explore that before we rule it out.”
- “Thanks for pushing back—I appreciate the honesty.”
- “I didn’t get that right. Here’s what I learned.”
That’s what safety sounds like.
Your Leadership Challenge
This week, instead of trying to be right, try being open.
Ask a quieter team member what they think.
Thank someone for disagreeing.
Own a mistake out loud.Because influence doesn’t come from perfection.
It comes from presence.