Carla was a powerhouse. Smart. Driven. On every committee. She thought networking meant hustling hard to “get her name out there.”
But she felt drained.
Then she flipped the script. Instead of chasing contacts, she started thanking people. Every email, every meeting, every encounter was an opportunity to express genuine appreciation.
The result? People leaned in. Relationships deepened. Opportunities multiplied.
Gratitude became her secret networking superpower.
Why Gratitude Builds Bridges
Here’s the leadership truth: Gratitude isn’t just polite. It’s powerful.
- Psychology research shows that people who express gratitude build 25% stronger social bonds.
- Leaders who practice gratitude are seen as more approachable, trustworthy, and inspiring.
- Gratitude shifts conversations from transactional to transformational.
In other words: gratitude amplifies connection.
And connection amplifies influence.
Gratitude Begets Gratitude
This isn’t just theory. Psychologist Martin Seligman, often called the father of positive psychology, ran a groundbreaking study with U.S. Army soldiers.
He taught them a simple practice called Three Good Things:
Every night, before bed, write down three things that went well that day and why they happened.
Sounds basic, right? But the results were profound. Soldiers who practiced this for just two weeks reported higher resilience, better sleep, and a stronger sense of optimism.
Why? Because what you focus on expands.
Focus on problems, you’ll see more problems.
Focus on gratitude, you’ll see more to be grateful for.
My Gratitude Experiment
I learned this lesson the hard way in my own marriage.
My ex-husband used to drive me crazy. The undone chores. The socks left around the house. The toothpaste squeezed in the middle. Every little thing was under my microscope.
One day, I vented to my coach. He listened patiently, then said:
Mimi, what you focus on expands. Right now, you’re magnifying every negative. I want you to try a gratitude experiment.
The rules were simple:
- For 21 days, find one thing every day to be grateful for.
- It had to be different each day.
- I had to write it down and share it with him — but without telling him I was doing it.
So I did. Some days, I’d slip a note into his work bag:
“I appreciate you taking out the trash.”
“I appreciate you making my coffee this morning.”
At first it felt small. But slowly, everything shifted.
I stopped fixating on the undone chores. I started noticing the small kindnesses. And here’s the magic: he started doing more of the things I showed gratitude for.
Gratitude didn’t just change what I saw. It changed how he showed up.
Leaders, Here’s the Real Talk
The same is true for your team.
If all you focus on are mistakes, you’ll magnify mistakes. If you start recognizing contributions — even small ones — you’ll see more of them. And your people will do more of them.
Gratitude creates a feedback loop:
- You notice.
- You acknowledge.
- They repeat.
- The culture shifts.
And soon, gratitude becomes the rhythm of the team.
3 Ways to Amplify Connection Through Gratitude
This Thanksgiving, don’t just think of gratitude as a holiday sentiment. Think of it as a leadership strategy.
1. Try your own “Three Good Things.”
End your workday by writing down three wins — no matter how small.
2. Catch people doing something right.
Don’t wait for performance reviews. Say thank you in the moment.
3. Create a gratitude ripple.
Host a gratitude huddle where each person shares one appreciation. Watch how quickly the energy shifts.
Your Turn
This holiday season, don’t underestimate the power of thank you.
✨ Gratitude builds bridges. Bridges build trust. And trust fuels influence.💡🧠
👉 Over to you: Who’s one person you’re grateful for in your leadership journey? Drop their name in the comments — and maybe tag them too.